Whoosh!

I'm in total disbelief in that is seems this school year has just gone by in a flash! There are days and weeks when I feel like I'm drowning in work - though good work - that by the time I come up for air and call home, I get a tease of "Hi there, stranger" as a greeting.

At this moment, I think about how the weekend before Spring Break, I received a phone call from my great uncle, requesting me to take him to the pharmacy to get some meds he needs. I told him I should have a chance, and when I did, I'd notify him, and we'd schedule the errand. It's now 2 weeks since we last spoke, and I haven't had the time, not the energy to take care of a nearby family member.

It all makes me feel so self-centered and inconsiderate. But I know it's not intentional on my part, and I know he'd forgive me should I ask for it, as he's sensitive enough to say something like, "Oh, don't worry yourself. It's not that important!"

I hope no one feels like I've forgotten them.

- Posted from my iPhone

The Book Blogs - Broken Government

Last night I read through chapter 1 of this book. A few hours later, my disdain for the way Republicans do politics had only increased. The author, John Dean, seemed to only be reaffirming everything I've learned about how the government, when controlled by the GOP runs the show.

I have to admit, I have this base theory that Republicans will trump the needs of the people so the members of their party can earn fat checks from interests groups only interested in making profits, not in serving their customers' needs.

That's my opinion.

Of all the horrendous practices Dean explained that the GOP had done, among them include trying to pass a bill to help cut the deficit. How would they cut it? They'd take away Medicare benefits. Before this law was to be passed, one Medicare benefit was that patients who needed an oxygen would have it paid for for as long as they needed it. But what would this law do? Only pay for 18 months of oxygen. WTF?! Seriously? You want to cut the deficit. I get that. All Americans want that. But put the cut on the sick and homebound? For the party that claims to be so moral, they're nothing but hypocrites!

Without needing to go into more bullshit, courtesy of our beloved Republican party, the next chapter will be about the damage in the Executive Branch, and how it's under repair.

By the way, all this that Dean writes about, it was all during W's reign. That douche.

- Posted from my iPhone

So much to do, and one less hour to do it

I'm so glad Spring Break is here! It's truly one of the pros of being a teacher. I get an entire week of to just do things I want to do, and things I need to do!

Several things need to get done:
-Frank and I need to turn in our census cards to St. Peter, the Apostle Church since we've been going there more and more.
-I need to finish the article on posadas that I was asked to write. Got a LOT done on that already, and still have some more to go. My goal is to be finished with it by Wednesday.
-I need to notate my song "Moving Forward" since I need to teach it to the kids in choir for 5th grade graduation. Last year, when I wrote it, I performed it and accompanied the choir myself. This time, I may actually ask another teacher to accompany for me. And should that happen, it'd be surreal for me...someone else performing MY music. The only time I hear my music played is when I'm the one playing it. No one else knows how to play my stuff.
-I need to write more lesson plans for the next couple of weeks of school.
-I need to call up Bank of America so I can get a better homeowner's insurance policy premium.
-I need to call the Travis County Tax Office to inquire about our property tax increase...blegh.
-I need to organize the storage shelves in the garage.

Several things I *want* to get done:
-I want to see Alice in Wonderland at the Alamo Drafthouse.
-I want to get together with some colleagues to have a night out on the town.
-I want to go with Frank's dad on the Wine Trail. In fact, I get to do that tomorrow, or Wednesday. Who's excited?!
-I want to upload a new video onto YouTube of another one of my songs.
-I want to complete notating "Be Still (and Know)".
-I want to finish reading Broken Government in my effort to fall in love with reading. 

*sigh*

I could go on. I do feel good, though, that today I did hammer out a lot of that posada article. I feel kinda proud of myself for that. I have so much to write about, and for once, I'm stuck in organizing all my thoughts. Right now, it's about 5 pages long, and that's because I have like 6 pictures taking up some major space. Thank God I've got it notated already.

I hope my Spring Break is both relaxing and productive. Right now, it does feel that way. That time change didn't help, though...dammit. But...in all fairness, if I had to choose a time to get used to the time change, it'd be Spring Break. It's a hell of a lot better than having to go to work the next day and losing an hour of sleep in the process. The genius who came up with that needs to be shot...unless someone already took care of it.

A morning like no other

This morning started off like no other morning in my 3+ years with Frank. I woke up around 7:30 am feeling a tap on my back. Wanting to give him a "good morning" hug, I moved closer to him, and then I heard him say "You might need to take me to the hospital. I've got a migraine that hasn't gone away, and I've already taken medication."

Frank suffers from chronic migraines, it's genetic, too. He takes a daily medication to prevent them (Verapamil), but should one come anyway, he takes a migraine pain reliever (Frova) that works 95% of the time. The other 5% of the time, he may need to be hospitalized to make the migraine go away. We met in 2006, and I learned during the first few months that he tended to have a migraine once a year that was bad enough to hospitalize him. The last migraine that was this bad was back in 2005. So, he's gone 5 years without needing to go in.

So we got out of bed, got dressed, and I drove him to the ER at St. David's Hospital, a location he directed me to. I dropped him off, parked, and then went in expecting to find him waiting to be received. To my amazement, he was already sitting in the office behind those sliding partitions answering questions about his pain and his current state. After a few questions, he was led to a bed where the doctor soon came, and a nurse started an IV treatment. After signing some papers, a few trips to the bathroom, and some much needed rest, we were discharged maybe 90 minutes later. We really didn't stay there long!

On our way out, a lady, sitting in the waiting room, barefoot, asked if she could have a ride home. "I've been here all night, needing medication for my fibromyalgia." Coincidentally, I had seen this woman earlier that morning upon arrival. After I had parked my car, upon entering the ER waiting room, she had stopped me outside asking if I had a cigarette I could give her. I told her I didn't have any since I don't smoke. I apologized, and went my way to Frank. So here she was again, asking for help, and looking very pitiful, as if waiting for someone to give her some ounce of human compassion, some mercy. Feeling caught between a rock and a hard place, I both wanted to do the humane thing and come to her aid, but I also wanted to get Frank home from the hospital!

"Where do you live?" I asked.
"I leave by East Riverside and Wickersham, at my son's apartment."
"Oh, I know where that is. Well, I can call a cab for you."
"I don't have any money."
"I have some cash I can give you."

I opened my phone and was about to start dialing 411 to find a cab company, until I thought to myself, As nervous as this makes me, giving a stranger a ride, taking her myself would be the easiest way to go...and it's actually on our way home. Turning to Frank, I asked him in Spanish (assuming she wouldn't understand) "Do you have a problem if we take her with us?"
"Nope."
I looked at her. "We'll take you home, ma'am."

She followed us to our car, and I had the most awkward 10 minutes in my car I think I've ever had. The woman didn't know where we were going, since she thought we were downtown. Hardly. She was from Oregon and was only staying with her son for a few days. He couldn't come to get her because he was waiting for a mechanic to show up to fix his broken-down vehicle. Nearing the apartment complex, she went further in her request for charity asking for some money for a meal.

God works in *mysterious* ways.

This past weekend, I had gone downtown with some friends and pulled out some cash from the ATM. I still had some left over (and I seldom carry cash; I don't like to) so upon arriving, I gave her some money.

We arrived home, and Frank went back to sleep since his high dosage of Benadryl was still in his system, knocking him out for about another 2-3 hours. 

What. a. morning!

The Book Blogs - Sidenote

I'm watching Julie & Julia...again...cause the movie is deliciously adorable! As Julie is narrating what she blogs, it made me think that I probably should've read Julie Powell's book! I already love the movie, and in most cases, the book is better than the movie...according to those who read more than I do.

Maybe when I'm finished with Broken Government, I'll go in a different direction and read what I'm sure would be a deliciously easy read!

(Aren't these culinary puns cuuuuuuuuuute?)

After all, I know Frank would love it if I learned to cook. Hell, I'd love it too!



- Posted from my iPhone

The Book Blogs - Broken Government by John W. Dean

Frank and I were at BookPeople yesterday. I hadn't been there in like 20 years! It was nice to go in. It was there that I saw Julie Powell's Julie & Julia, the book made into the major motion picture. I also found a copy of Mastering the Art of French Cooking by Julia Child herself, the cookbook which was the premise of the movie Julie & Julia. If you haven't seen that film, I highly recommend it!

So here I am titling this blog what it's called, and the book I'll be writing about has nothing to do with cooking. I realize that. But it was when I saw those books when I remembered a scene in the movie:

JULIE: 

I can write a blog. I have thoughts. Yeah, I'll cook my way through Julia Child's cookbook and blog about it. 

This became the cornerstone of my reading goal. Pick a book, read it, and write about my thoughts after having read it, and hopefully capture my literary journey of putting books back in my heart, where I know they truly belong.

When Frank and I were looking around, he supported the idea that if I wanted to love reading, I needed to read something that truly interested me. Right now, the things that interest me are hot-button issues:

-gay marriage
-homosexuality and religion
-politics and current events
-understanding the truths, myths, and lies about the political spectrum

When I narrowed down my interests, we went to the Politics section of the store, and he picked out a book he thought I'd like: Broken Government: How Republican Rule Destroyed the Legislative, Executive, and Judicial Branches by John W. Dean. Frank explained to me that this man was working for Nixon, resigned, and turned on Nixon due to the corruption of the Watergate scandals. So far, I've read the preface, and the 24-page introduction entitled "Process Matters".

Following the introduction, the book has 4 chapters: 3 chapters (1 for each branch and its state of "damage" however reparable or lack thereof), and a final chapter on how to repair the government's processes.

Upon starting to read the preface and introduction, it seemed that the book was only reaffirming all the negatives against the Republicans that I've heard from moderate-to-liberal commentators on podcasts or live streaming online videos. Some people say they prefer Fox News *gag reflex* because it's "fair and balanced." Others have told me that they'd watch a segment on Fox News, then see the same segment on a different news media channel, and the stories would be very different.

Well, from what I've read so far, according to the author and his experiences on the inside, Republicans are not fit to govern a nation. They are too busy trying to help themselves stay in power so what they want done can get done, and that because their standards are being met, it'll hopefully fix national problems. Bullshit, I think. But more so, the introduction focused more on what the author said were called "process issues". This refers to how things get done in government. How will laws be made and passed? How will court decisions be handled? According to Dean, process issues are of little importance to candidates, especially when they're running for their designated office. Media sources also fail to discuss much about process issues as well.

However...

During W's reign - and yes, I do mean reign - Dean writes that CNN put out a series entitled Broken Government where reporters were asking ordinary citizens about what they thought about our current system of government. To Dean's amazement, not one person questioned anything about policy; every citizen spoke about how politicians were going about doing things and getting stuff done: process issues. So upon reflection, citizens, you know, those people candidates are supposed to represent, actually DO give a shit about process issues. But their candidates? Hmm...not so much.

Of course Dean went into even more detail, more than I'll go into here. After all, these blogs are meant to be summaries about the content I'm reading, but more importantly, about how I'm hoping reading what I like will make me enamored with it. I don't have much else to say because I've only read the intro. We'll see what my tongue and fingers will let loose on this keyboard in the days (weeks?...months?!) to come as I read this book. But on a humorous note, at least for me, I love how Dean said this in his book (he quoted Alan Wolfe, Ph.D., professor of political science at the University of Pennsylvania) that he wanted to catch a reader's attention for some very important upcoming information; if I ever was going to daydream while reading, a statement like this would catch and keep my undivided attention:

If I could turn on a blinking red light to catch a reader's attention, to give him a heads-up to alert him to pay attention, I would place it next to the following observations of political scientist Alan Wolfe: "Political parties expend the time and grueling energy to control government for different reasons," he explained, viewing politics with his wide-angle lens.

 Liberals, while enjoying the perquisites of office, also want to be in a position to use government to solve problems. But conservatives have different motives for wanting power. One is to prevent liberals from doing so; if government cannot be made to disappear, at least it can be prevented from doing any good. The other is to build a political machine in which business and the Republican Party can exchange mutual favors; business will lavish cash on politicians (called campaign contributions) while politicians will throw the money back at business (called public policy). Conservatism will always attract its share of young idealists. And young idealists will always be disillusioned by the sheer amount of corruption that people like Gingrich and DeLay generate. If yesterday's conservative was a liberal mugged by reality, today's is a free-marketer fattened by pork. 

 Dean goes on to say (and with this I'll conclude this post):

If you understand these observations of Alan Wolfe you have grasped the essence of Republican rule. If not, reread this passage, for you will never find a more succinct explanation of the quintessence of modern Republicanism.

I've taken little joy in writing this book. Frankly, I once believed Republicans would be good at governing. But I was wrong: They have demonstrated that they can only rule for limited periods. As used in the pages that follow, "governing" is a craft, a skill, even an art; it is an effort to find common rules under which all can pursue happiness; "ruling," in contrast, is merely reigning and exercising power. 

The Book Blogs - Introduction

Consider this my blog intro for this series I'm now starting to write. I've decided to create and follow through with my own reading regimen. I'll pick a book, and as I get through it, I'll blog about reading it, comment on it, etc.

Here's my deal, and the reason for starting this series. I'm a teacher, and I've NEVER been very fond of books, and to me, a teacher SHOULD be fond of books. I love the idea of being well-read. I love the idea of being able to finish a book quickly and understand its content, its plot, or whatever. I love that one's vocabulary can greatly increase, not to mention support one's writing ability. But I've never been a big fan of books, and here's why:

When I was in school, from middle all through high school (Oy, in high school it was worse!), reading stories and books was both required and expected. I remember being in my reading class and having to work on a worksheet in the textbook's accompanying workbook, and filling in the blanks that would, if you answered correctly, recall the plot in detail of the story you just read. I've always been a slow reader. Sitting in class, of course you're seldom thinking of your own stuff; you're always thinking of what your friends are doing, thinking, and wondering what they think of what you're doing. It seemed everyone finished faster than me. Now though I know now that doesn't necessarily mean they did a "good job" on the activity, but it made me feel incompetent. Why are you still reading? They're already finished, I'd think to myself. It always felt like some unspoken competition, a competition that I'd never win.

Another time, also in middle school, I remember that we each had a thick textbook called Literature. We were given a homework assignment to read some pages. Of course, I didn't do the homework. The next day? Pop quiz! Oh, shit! It was one of those short, 5-question, multiple choice quizzes on handouts you weren't allowed to write on. Of course, I failed it with crashing colors. While sitting at a table with a few other peers, with a pen in my hand and my head down on my desk in embarrassment, I wrote "I suck" on what I thought was the clean sheet of loose leaf paper I used to cover my answer sheet. When I finished writing, I raised my head, and to my horror, I realized I had written "I suck" on the quiz paper itself, the one we were not allowed to write on. Of course the teacher picked it up, read it aloud, and sent me to the office. I had almost received a "pink slip" (a referral). In that school, if you got 3 pink slips, you were expelled.That would've been my first. I ended up getting detention, not a referral.

All that because I didn't want to read, because everyone read faster than me, because the book was too thick, because I was a slow reader...blah blah blah blah.

Then came high school.

In high school, we had the Accelerated Reader program. I think we started using it when I became a freshman. I remember getting a Summer Reading List. Upon getting it, I thought, What the hell?! I need to read for the entire Summer too?!

If you don't know what the AR program is, well, the way it worked for us was that we'd read a book, and then take a computer-based test on it. The tests were ALWAYS multiple choice, and either 10 or 20 questions. No True/False; only ABCD. But here's the fine print they didn't tell us about: whether it was a 10- or 20-question test you were taking, you had to get at least 70% correct to get ANY credit. If you got a 65 out of 20 questions, you were given NO credit. That was bullshit! The AR program, consequently, only fueled my grudge against reading. I guess when it came to the AR program, we were also a college prep high school, so standards were very high to get us reading substantial books and writing papers of up to 5 pages long, which to us, was a lot. We had Advanced Placement courses (AP) that required us to read several books per semester, and even more in the summer. Because of AR, I remember reading several books, some of which I enjoyed, others I didn't:. Some I finished, some I didn't. 

-Upton Sinclair's The Jungle 
-Amy Tan's The Joy Luck Club
-Pearl Buck's The Good Earth
-Mary Shelley's Frankenstein
-Toni Morrison's Beloved
-Jonathan Swift's Gulliver's Travels
-Rudolfo Anaya's Bless Me, Ultima
-Chinua Achebe's Things Fall Apart
-Alan Paton's Cry, the Beloved Country

Okay. I know I've gone on some serious tangents now, but really, because of my middle school and high school struggles with the reading programs, my reading speed, and my frequent failures when it came to reading, it's never been a hobby of mine. Hell, when I'm reading a book, I look through the number of chapters, and I measure how long it'll take me to read each chapter by counting how many pages I'll have to turn. Pathetic, huh? Now as an adult, and as a teacher no less, I'm going to give myself a goal: read books I want to read and write about what I'm reading. It's no longer a task. I have to change my perception of books. After all, reading should be fun, right?

Now, I do

I remember when I was a child. One of my memories was when my father would try to open my Michael Jackson-obsessed mind to different styles of music. In his eyes, he was educating his children to be open to the joy that music in all its forms could offer. At that age, though (I was under 10), I adamantly refused to watch some movies for really stupid reasons. But I was stubborn and wouldn't give in despite my parents' best efforts.

Now, as an adult, as an educated musician, I'm ecstatic to sit in the 10th row to watch a live Broadway production of Fiddler on the Roof. I'm so glad I've come around. Musical theater is so rich with good music. The less I see, the less I'm aware of, and as a music teacher, I should know as much about music as I can.

Though there are plenty I still haven't seen, Broadway plays I have seen include:

-Me and My Girl
-Miss Saigon
-42nd Street
-The Lion King
-Phantom of the Opera
-Wicked
-RENT
-Spring Awakening, and now
-Fiddler on the Roof

*sigh*

And as I type this, I sit in my seat next to my love, and I take joy in listening to the instrumentalists in the orchestra pit practice and tune up.

I thank God for granting me all these treasures in my life!

- Posted from my iPhone

De larga jornada...

My title is Spanish and it means "from a long journey." I'm naming my blog this title because I just remembered something very important. While I was at TMEA this past month, one of my Kodály instructors approached me and said, "I want you to write an article for the Kodály Envoy about your family's posadas.

Le what?

Let me explain things first. Kodály (koh-DIE) is named after Hungarian musician Zoltán Kodály. He died in 1967, but he was a tremendous influence in music education. With the help of his pupils to research, his philosophy was that "music belongs to everyone" which is, of course, true. His goal as an educator was to make children love music by understanding how it works. If you're a consummate musician, and you can teach them about music with high-quality music, you'll instill in children a lifetime of thirst for good music, and of course a desire to learn more about it; how to read it, write it, improvise with it, and of course sing tunefully. There's a specific style of pedagogy involved in teaching in the style of Kodály.

Which brings me to this paragraph. As an elementary music teacher in my district, I am required to become Kodály certified. That means over the course of three 3-week courses in July of each year, I'm attending a workshop to get me certified in the pedagogy. I'm learning folksongs, dances, games, recorder materials, conducting, and much more. This instructor I mentioned above is one of the people teaching us all. She's an ethnomusicologist and an elementary music teacher in San Antonio. She's got an undying love for Mexican folk songs for children. Being Hispanic myself (though I know I don't look it), I've grown up each Christmas with my family doing what's called a posada. The word itself means "shelter", as the idea behind the celebration is to remember Mary and Joseph's journey to find shelter before Jesus was born.

My mom is the youngest of 6 kids. She and 3 of her siblings host posadas every year. What we do is go to that person's house, enjoy family and friends, and then at some point in the evening, it's time to sing...and we sing a capella (i.e., no musical accompaniment). The men stay inside and act as the innkeepers. The women go outside and act as the pilgrims seeking shelter. When you do this tradition the "right" way, you're supposed to go from one house to another until a house admits you to their shelter, followed by prayer, and then a feast. With us, we keep it simpler; we use 3 doors of our home to act as the 3 inns. The women knock on the first door, and request shelter in song. The men turn them down saying there is no vacancy. At the 2nd door, the same thing happens. At the last door, the men finally admit the women. We gather at the nacimiento or nativity scene, pray, sing Silent Night, and then it's time to eat. :-)

So, my instructor asked me to write an article in the Envoy about this tradition. I was hugely excited since the Envoy is the magazine for the Organization of American Kodály Educators (OAKE), a national organization of which I am a member. Have you any idea what kind of a career boost that is?! I was freakin' ecstatic! She asked me to interview my family, describe the celebration, provide its history and everything. I'll probably write it this weekend. I only remembered I needed to do it still this morning. I can't pass up this chance to both boost my career, and put my family history in a professional article. I'm so excited! She asked me to write it, submit it to her as she'd help me edit and revise, and then once we got o the OAKE conference this month, she'd introduce me to the editor of the magazine, or someone who works for it.

God-willing, my name will be in the Kodály Envoy, and my family's heritage will be professionally shared!

Oh...and as for the title of this blog, De larga jornada, that's how the singing begins in my family...thus the significance of the title.

Wish me luck!

You make it hard for me to help you

My title says it all, really. After yesterday, I'm not proud of how I reacted with you, but I couldn't help let out some anger and frustration that's been building up lately. Verbal communication doesn't seem to work. I'm not about to  threaten you as that goes against my ethics, but I've still got some more ideas that I'll try to see if they'll improve our dynamics when we're together.

What gets me the most is that you don't take me seriously when I need you to. And seeing that lack of respect just irritated me beyond words! I hope our relationship improves over the next few weeks, but my hopes aren't that high, unfortunately. Getting to know you over the past few weeks has given me only proof that we'll probably never get along; I'll struggle with you, and you'll only struggle with me.