If it was easy, everybody would do it!

I come from a highly-educated family. On my mother's side, she's 1 of 6 kids, and each has at least a college diploma. On her side, I have 4 uncles (a pediatrician, chemical engineer, architect, insurance agent) and 1 aunt (a lawyer). My parents both earned Master's degrees, and now Mom's working on completing a Ph.D.

My older brother and sister, and their respective spouses, all have college degrees. So, going to college, in our family, was always a given. It was expected. Once I finished college, I was immediately encouraged to earn my Master's. My parents advised me: "Don't get a job now. Get your Master's over with, because if you go back to school after working for a few years, it'll be much harder to make that adjustment." They were absolutely right.

I'm so glad I followed their advice...so much so that I started grad school the very next month after I finished college. So, I literally went straight through. 

But over time, I've realized something. I'm starting to feel as though all my certifications and diplomas reflect a certain level of self-worth. Not only getting the certificate or diploma, but even more so, from the institution conferring it upon me. I earned my Bachelor's at Texas A&M International University. I earned my Master's at Texas State University-San Marcos. I've earned my Kodály Certificate through the OAKE-endorsed Texas State University Kodály Certification Program.

In our world, on planet Earth, it's my understanding that a Doctorate (Ph.D., D.M.A., Psy.D., Pharm.D., Ed.D., J.D., M.D., etc.) is the highest level of academic achievement one can earn, with a Master's being the 2nd highest. Of course, these are documentations implemented by humans to measure someone's commitment to ongoing professional development and excellence. The more you earn, the more reputable you are as an expert in your field...to the point where you are a sought-after to train and present new research on an international level.

That makes me remember something: During one of my semesters in grad school, I called my mom on the phone, worried I couldn't finish because of the level of difficulty of my assignments. She gave me a valuable reality check. "Of course getting a Master's is hard," she said. "If it was easy, everybody would do it!"

So now, I live in a beautiful home, living the American Dream  in a city I absolutely love with the man I love, the house I wanted, car I wanted, career I love, and so many more blessings.

I have a Master's, and the only thing harder I can earn is a Ph.D., and if I pursue one, I choose to pursue it in music education.

But the only university around here that offers a Ph.D. in music education is the University of Texas at Austin (UT). Other universities in Texas and other states offer this degree, but I'd have to relocate, and that is NOT an option. UT is a school I've applied to twice before, and got rejected from twice: once for the Master's (before I landed at Texas State), and again for the Ph.D. Both times, I had applied for the music theory program. Now, because my husband happens to be a UT alum, and also because our home is consequently adorned with some UT décor, I feel even more pressed to get a degree from UT...but not just any degree: the highest and hardest degree in my favorite concentration, from one of the most competitive higher learning institutions in the country (if not the world).

Can I do this? Why should I do this? What do I have to prove? If I have to prove anything, to whom do I have to prove it? Is it just because I'd love for people to address me with "Doctor" before my name? Well, that's a little vain, isn't it? Is it because I'd love to see the letters "Ph.D." appear after my name on a business card? That's probably vanity all over again, and those are probably the worst reasons to take on something like this.

How do we as a society measure worth? I've heard this saying before, "The more you know, the more you're worth." That holds great truth when it comes to job hunting and retention. If someone came up to me and said, "Give me every reason why I shouldn't fire you right now," I could only respond: "I hold 2 degrees in music, I've completed my Kodály certification from an OAKE-endorsed program where I studied with 5 internationally renowned master teachers for 3 years, I can read, write, speak, and understand 3 languages fluently (English, Spanish, ASL), I excel in my written and verbal communication skills, I'm certified to teach both GT and all levels of music from PK - 12th grade, I'm proficiently skillful when using technology, the administration has evaluated my teaching several times and has determined that I exceed expectations overall, and I'm the only one on this campus who can do my job the way it's supposed to be done."

So, if all that (and possibly more) is enough justification for me keeping my job, why should a Ph.D. matter? Why does it matter so much to me that I get one? The only people in my school district who hold Doctorates are usually administrators at the district level, not elementary music teachers. Besides, I know for a fact that my school district wouldn't pay me extra for having a Ph.D. 

So why do I want one?. I sure don't need it. I just want it...very badly. I want to feel a certain way about myself that I feel only UT accepting me and conferring on me the highest possible degree would make me feel. But I'm a very lazy person, and that type of person shouldn't pursue such a difficult workload. It would be a massive time commitment, not to mention a costly one. And yet, those 3 little letters, Ph.D., mean the world to me.

Before I even apply, I have to face and conquer many inner demons, including (but not limited to), my utter hatred for the GRE (which stems from my hatred of standardized tests in general).

I don't know if this will ever happen. I obsess and obsess over it. But every time I walk the UT campus and see students with their backpacks, I think to myself, "What do they have that I don't, and how can I get it?" I view UT students like an elite intellectual club that I yearn to join.

If I go through with it and push myself, I just have to remember what Mom told me: "If it was easy, everybody would do it."

Lazy longhorn envy

Frank is a longhorn. Several of my cousins are longhorns. My brother is a longhorn. My favorite college professor is a longhorn. I live in Austin.

I hear about high school kids getting into UT for college, and every time I see a friend's UT diploma displayed, a part of me becomes very jealous. I associate UT as Texas' version of Harvard. I've never been a UT student, but Frank and I are season ticket holders for many UT performing arts events.

I've earned my Bachelor's degree, and my Master's. The only degree I have yet to earn is my Doctorate, a degree I aspire to earn. But I don't know if I ever will. If I ever go for a Doctorate, it'll more than likely be in music education, or as the UT Butler School of Music calls it, a Ph.D. in Music and Human Learning. I love how that sounds.

In my head, I have this association with UT that if I don't ever get admitted to UT, I'll never reach my highest educational potential. For me, getting a Ph.D. from UT is essentially being a genius. But UT is very competitive. Extremely competitive. They have limited spots for their Ph.D. programs, and applicants from all over the world apply to get in. What kind of chance do I have?

Now, is it possible for me to get admitted? Yes, of course it is. Is it probable, probably not. It can happen, but it probably won't. I've done my research of what's required to get admitted, and admission requires several things I'm not prepared or motivated enough to do:

-Take the GRE test (I loathe that exam; well, I'm bad at standardized tests in general). 
-Take music diagnostic exams (All together, they're about 3 hours long). To take these exams, I'd have to majorly brush up on my familiarity with music history, scores identification skills, and so many other things, because Ph.D. candidates should be able to teach just about any course a university has them teach. I know I'm not at that level of qualification.
-Have at least 3 years of teaching experience.

I'll be 100% honest: I'm obsessed with the idea of being a longhorn more than I care to roll up my sleeves to do the work necessary to become one. I just want to apply, get in, take my classes, and write my dissertation. I want a prestigious UT diploma that declares me to be a Doctor of Philosophy in Music and Human Learning. But I can't do that. If I want to get in, I need to study for and take the GRE, review several music history books, familiarize myself with as many scores as I can from every major era of music history, and be able to take 4-part melodic dictation. And the only thing stopping me from doing all this is my own laziness.

Because of this inner demon, I don't know if I'll ever be motivated enough to do all the work required to get the highest degree possible from one of the best universities in the country.

Playing devil's advocate, let's say I do get in. I'm already paying off student loans I took out for my Master's degree. I still have a good 17 years before those are paid off. If I pursue the Ph.D., I'll have to defer loan payments, and add to the debt as well. That's the only way I could afford to go.

Also, one can only apply to UT Doctoral programs in the fall semester. And that deadline is for admission starting the FOLLOWING fall. So if I get everything done this year to get in, I wouldn't start until fall 2013. Yep. That's how it works.

Frank has suggested that I simpy apply to get in and take classes refresher courses, but not apply to the School of Music. Getting admitted to the university is one thing; getting admitted into a specialized program is entirely another.

UT has been on my mind a lot lately since the end of this school year quickly approaches. I don't know how many high school students are getting admitted to UT. But I know plenty will be there. And when I go to campus for any event, I see longhorns with backpacks on, and I desperately want to be one of them.

*sigh* A dream that is realistically accessible, yet internally and mentally out of reach. We are our own worst enemies when it comes to achieving our goals and dreams.

Either way, GO LONGHORNS!

Joyous relief

Before I begin, "Kodály" is pronounced "KOH-die".

That being said...

This past Wednesday, April 13, 2011, I received an e-mail in the morning from my Kodály professor. He told me he had my teaching videos, but asked me where the lesson plans and self-evaluations were. When I calmly told him they were all sent together, he later e-mailed me with the following message: "I found them on my desk. You've passed." I looked at those 2 words: "You've passed." You've passed. My breathing quickened as if I was having an anxiety attack. I've passed? I've passed?! I ran to the bedroom where Frank lay sleeping (it was about 9:30 pm by now). My hyperventilating woke him up. "Are you okay?!" he asked. Unable to respond, I kept breathing heavily while turning on the light, displaying a smile, and giving 2 thumbs up to at least let him know my heavy breathing was a good thing. Between breaths, I managed to say, "I just got an e-mail from [my professor]. My teaching videos passed. I'm DONE!" After a little more heavy breathing, I collapsed onto the bedroom floor and began to sob tears of joyous relief.

The majority of people I know don't know what this is all about. "What's 'Ko-DALL-ee'?" they ask me. Kodály is the last name of Zoltán Kodály who was a Hungarian composer and music educator. He simply believed that all people have a right to a quality musical education, especially kids. His research and educational philosophy spawned a movement in elementary music education that has spread worldwide. His work evolved into a pedagogical style and methodology that is known as both the Kodály Method and the Kodály Concept. Because of how it works, it's an international success in elementary music. My school district requires that all its elementary music teachers (myself included) must become certified in this style of pedagogy. We must become "Kodály Music Specialists". How long does it take to complete the certification? Three years for 3 levels. What's a bigger pill to swallow is that we're given 5 years to complete the certification. If we don't finish it in time, we're put on a growth plan, which could lead to potential termination, though there has yet to be any such precedent. I finished with 1 year left in my 5-year time frame. In my district, there are 13 of us, and 6 of us are finished, myself now included. Four more are almost finished, and 3 more have 1-3 years to go.

In order to earn Kodály certification (the way I did), one must do the following:

• Take over 300 hours worth of course work (ideally done in 3 weeks in 3 consecutive summers)
• Analyze over 200 folk songs in the required format, including finding their ethnic origins, and locating legitimate sources to trace their heritage) 
• Learn to execute a new music teaching theory model in which you learn to teach music musically; musical activities with musical transitions from one activity to the next  
• Compile a digital retrieval system loaded with all the folk songs you've analyzed, so as you're writing a lesson plan, you can use the system to extract the songs you need to support whichever musical element you're teaching 
• Record and submit 2 teaching videos; the 1st one (either 1st or 2nd grade) must show an emerging understanding of the Kodály concept, and the 2nd (3rd, 4th, or 5th grade) must show proficiency in the concept. These videos either pass or fail. 

My school district co-sponsors this training with a nearby university. As a result, participants may either earn graduate credit towards a Master of Music degree in Kodály Pedagogy, or simply earn a Kodály certificate, which is what I did.

I started Level 1 in July 2008. That following school year, I recorded a 4th grade teaching video and submitted it during Level 2 in July 2009. It failed. That following school year, I recorded 2 videos: a 2nd grade video, and a 3rd grade video. I submitted them during Level 3. They both failed. I had completed everything...except the videos.

I felt defeated. I seriously considered a career change from teaching music to selling Mary Kay cosmetics full time. In reality, I knew I couldn't do that. My teaching was paying all my bills. I couldn't quit. I decided I wanted to record both of my new videos in Fall 2010 to get them over and done with by the holidays. My professor discouraged me from doing so because he felt I didn't have enough time from the start of the school year to practice and professionally develop. He told me he wanted to see evidence of months of on-going commitment and professional development in the video. February came and I attended the annual Texas Music Educators Association (TMEA) Convention in San Antonio, TX. There, 2 alumni from the same program I attended were giving a clinic on musical transitions (highly useful tools in Kodály pedagogy). Desperate for inspiration and motivation to finish something my career and life depended on, I attended their clinic. That 60-minute presentation turned on the biggest light bulb in my head! Watching them, I finally understood what I needed to do, and more importantly, I knew how to do it! I walked out of it completely re-motivated to finish my work. Later that month, I recorded 8 videos (each of 4 different 2nd and 3rd grade classes), and showed them to a colleague who finished the same year I started. She gave me some priceless feedback. I told myself, "I won't submit anything else unless I have reassurance that it'll pass." By the time I showed her the 7th and 8th videos, she said they were passable.

(Sidenote: When you submit teaching videos, 3 documents must accompany it: the detailed lesson plan [with every little thing you're doing in the video in writing], background information [which Kodály program you're in, your level, your school, district, etc.], and a self-evaluation.) 

With my colleague's approval, I submitted my work in the mail to my professor who works at a university in Pennsylvania. Not wanting to annoy him (especially since he held my fate in his hands), I requested that my colleague contact him regularly to check on the status of my videos. I had waited on pins and needles for over a month...fearing I wouldn't hear from him until May, and then wouldn't be able to submit another video until the following year.

Now, go back and re-read the first paragraph again.

I am now a Kodály Music Specialist, and my career is safe. 

Joyous relief. 

Joyous. relief.

They're called "rights" because they're ineligible for votes.

For the record, I'm not talking about marriage as a religious institution. I'm talking about the LEGAL RIGHT itself. That being said...

Whenever you engage in a discussion over social issues with conservatives, they typically tell you that they want limited government, that big government is a bad idea, and that the government shouldn't be running our lives. "I don't want the government telling me what I can and can't do," they say. This usually has to do with laws like gun control (the 2nd amendment to the US Constitution grants every American the right to bear arms). So, that's where conservatives stand: "I don't want the government telling me what to do; that's [pick one] un-American / Socialism / Communism, and we're a democracy!" Really? You don't want the government telling us what we can and can't do? Then why do you support a law where the government tells people whom they can marry? Because, that's what DOMA, the Defense of Marriage Act, does.

President Bill Clinton signed DOMA into law back in 1996. It pretty much left gay marriage up to the states. They could decide for themselves if they would ban it or not. Since DOMA, most states have banned gay marriage. Few have permitted it. But DOMA also gave states this provision: You don't have to recognize another state's gay marriage license. In other words, if a couple guys got hitched in Massachusetts, and moved to Texas, then Texas (thanks to 2005's Proposition 2) wouldn't recognize them as a married couple, even though in the state of Massachusetts, they're legally married. According to the equal protections clause in the 14th amendment of the US Constitution, that's unconstitutional and illegal.

(Sidenote: Clinton's view on gay marriage has since evolved to where now he supports it. Obama's current position is also "evolving". He supports civil unions, but he's not sure about gay marriage itself, although his administration no longer defends DOMA the way it used to.)

When W took over, half way through his double term, he came very close to signing into law the Federal Marriage Amendment which would have made it completely illegal in the US for any gay couples to get married. Thankfully, the FMA never survived, but that didn't stop other states from getting their own constitutional amendment into their law books.

But I just don't get it. Republicans and social conservatives (who typically vote according to religious values and beliefs) don't want government interference in the lives of Americans, but they're okay with this? This law, DOMA, discriminates! Most of the time, when conservatives defend their anti-gay marriage views, they refer to something called "the sanctity of marriage", and then back it up with the Bible. After that, they might mention how many marriages they themselves have had. Would you like a side of irony with your ignorance?

"Sanctity"? Really? No one ever cares about how many marriages straight people go through. It's no big deal. Even evangelical Christians have experienced a few divorces depending on which ones you ask. But get 2 men or 2 women who have spent decades together in a loving, exclusive, monogamous commitment, and that's an attack on the institution?! Get real. 

Gay marriage is viewed as a "special" right to some conservatives, and because the idea of gay marriage was so taboo a few years ago, that's when some people decided "Let's vote and see what the people want. Should gay people be allowed to marry?" Then all the debate really picked up, and out of the 50 states, a large number of them have constitutionally banned the right, excluding gay couples from being legally recognized and protected by their state's government. This brings me to my next and BIGGEST point:

As Rachel Maddow said, "They're called 'rights' because they're not supposed to be voted on." If you have a right to do something, you. have. a. right.

What if we took away everyone's right to freedom of speech? No, we can't do that, because we have a right to it, just like we have a right in this country to worship our chosen deity the way we want to. We have a right. The same way I have a right to put my voice out there in the cyber-verse, I have a right to be Catholic. I have a right to an education, to buy a house, to peaceably assemble and rally, to remain silent if arrested, to an attorney, to quality health care, to vote, and to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. I have the right to love whomever I want to love, and the person I love is the person I want to marry and be with in good times, in bad, in sickness, in health, in poverty, in prosperity, until death do we part, so help us God!

Among other reasons, conservatives don't want gays to marry because then our society will fail. Really? Allowing people to truly and freely love whom they want to love will breakdown our society? We're already past that. It's been said that you can judge a country's greatness by how it treats its animals, and its homeless. How does 2 people getting married hurt our country? Are you really concerned about having to explain that kind of thing to your kids?

"Mommy, Daddy, why are those 2 men holding hands and kissing?"
"Because they love each other."
"But aren't men only supposed to kiss women?"
"Most men like to kiss women, and some like to kiss other men. Sometimes, some women will kiss other women too, but they kiss because they love each other. Remember how we told you how everyone's different in their own way?"
"Yeah."
"Some people are good at music, other people are good at sports, some people live in big houses, some live in small apartments, some people have children, some people have pets instead, some do different things with their hair, some are left-handed, some have red hair, or blue eyes, or curly hair."
"Who will I kiss, Daddy?"
"You'll kiss the person you love."
"Who will that be?"
"That's up to you, when you're older and learn more about love."
"And you love Mommy, which is why you kiss her, right?"
"Yes, that's right. I love Mommy very much, and she loves me which is why she kisses me. And we love you which is why we kiss you!" 

Seriously, how difficult is that conversation? These are answers that are simple and easily understood to a kid in the 1st grade or kinder. If parents would get over their embarrassment and get to the truth of what is out there, then this wouldn't be an issue. DOMA wouldn't exist. DOMA doesn't defend anything but prejudice, and gives people a chance to use the Bible to justify ignorance and hate. By the way, the Bible has also been used to justify slavery, treating women as property, war, and other things that we're not stupid enough to justify.

Another reason to "defend" marriage is that then the institution itself will be "redefined". Okay, so, which century do you live in? It wasn't too long ago that (and still to this day) in some countries, marriages were arranged. They've been treated as business deals. In some cases, soon-to-be-wed couple never even met until the big day. It's been a social status where love didn't matter. It was more as a means of establishing social and financial security. When a woman was married off, it had little to do with love. In fact, when women decided to marry the man they loved, they were seen as radicals. Marriage has been evolving for decades to what it is now: a life-long commitment between 2 people who love each other completely, but also will reap the legal benefits attached to it. It is a legal contract now - a legal contract that anyone should be allowed to enter into with someone they love and want to spend their life loving.

People from all over the world come to live in America because it's "the land of the free, and home of the brave". And those words are taken directly from Francis Scott Key, the lyricist behind our National Anthem. In this country, we teach that you should be yourself. Be who you are, not what others want you to be. We teach it everywhere. DOMA tells people that if you love and want to marry someone who is of the same sex as you, you're denied the right to marry. That's a complete and utter hypocrisy.

Needless to say, I really hope DOMA gets repealed. If it does, then my partner and I (of almost 5 years come June 6th) can go to our county courthouse, pay a $71 fee, and enjoy state and federal benefits and protections for the rest of our lives. These are benefits like:

-filing taxes jointly
-hospital visitation rights
-medical decisions
-and over 1,000 more...yes, over 1,000 more.

To quote the movie Get Real, "It's only love. What's everyone so afraid of?"

Repocrisy

If you're annoyed by political blog posts, especially posts written by solid liberals, then I suggest you stop reading now and do something else.

If you're still interested in my political thinking, I welcome you to keep reading.

The title of my blog directly attacks the Republican party, and those who support it. I admit I didn't know much about the difference between Republicans and Democrats when I was in high school. In fact, I'm embarrassed to admit that when I was in college and W was president, I actually supported him and even enjoyed a few of his speeches, feeling proud to have him lead our country. That was BEFORE I realized not only the level of his stupidity, but also that his party was staunchly against equal rights for gay people...a community I accepted belonging to back in 2001. Coincidentally, today, March 12, 2011, I celebrate my 10-year anniversary of coming out as a proud gay man. Kiss my ass, W! KISS MY ASS!

So, there I was in college thinking W was pretty good, until I learned of Republicans' positions on social issues. That's when I started learning the difference between conservatives and liberals. For someone who's empathetic like me, being socially conservative is not only detrimental to society, but dangerous, too. Being socially conservative places many stigmas and labels on those who are marginalized in society, and it justifies many with prejudices towards any social minority to truly treat them in sub-human manners. And these are the same people who claim to be Christians (i.e., "followers of Christ").

For years, I had it in my head that Democrats were immoral people simply because they were the party that supported the woman's right to choose whether she wanted to keep her unborn baby or not. Growing up in a Catholic household, "pro-choice" is something that stigmatizes you in any Catholic community, which my hometown also is. Now, 10 years later, I see the Republican party for what it really is: evil, ignorant, greedy, careless, and selfish. But they use a façade of being moral people to cover it all up.

Republicans are pro-life: they want to pass laws that make it illegal to abort an unborn baby. This is probably the only part of them I support. Although, my own disclaimer I must include: I'd NEVER encourage a woman to abort her child, but it's not up to me, it's up to her. Many conservatives say, "It's not a choice, it's a child!" I agree with that, but there are many exceptional circumstances. Some women get raped or are victims of incest. Conservatives would argue that even in these circumstances, the baby doesn't deserve to die, which I kind of agree with, but I also see that it's not a life that was created out of love.

Republicans usually support the death penalty. See the irony here? They insist mothers keep their children, but they're okay with capital punishment. If you're pro-life, shouldn't you be COMPLETELY pro-life? What right do you have to tell a woman what to do with her child? It's her baby, not yours. What right do you have in terminating someone's life? Oh, but the guy is a serial killer. So, do we kill people to show that killing people is bad?

Republicans believe in "trickle-down economics" in which they give massive amounts of money (provided by us middle and lower class taxpayers) to the wealthiest people in America who own and run big (sometimes international) corporations. The idea is that with the extra money, they'll use it to build their business and this will create jobs. If you create jobs, the economy improves because people with jobs earn money, and spend it, and it's a big boost for the economy. Seems like the perfect plan, right? WRONG. These CEOs that get extra money for their multi-million or billion dollar corporations usually spend it on things other than their business. They'll give THEMSELVES bonus checks that they need to buy that new house in another part of the world for their annual vacation. And those jobs they could be giving to Americans go overseas to places like China, India, Thailand, Vietnam, and others where labor is CHEAP. They do this so they can spend less on labor, and thus maximize their profits for shareholders. This is probably one of the biggest areas of the party I absolutely loathe. They give the wealthiest people in our country hundreds of thousands of dollars in tax cuts, and the people who pay for these tax cuts are the ones who need the money the most. What happens when you do this for over 10 years? America is now in debt several trillion dollars. As in, we owe more than this much: $1,000,000,000,000. That's 12 zeroes. And who gets to pay it back? Our kids. Yep. But...Republicans are moral people! They're Christians! How could they bankrupt our country and give the money to the people who are hoarding it all for themselves? But...they're supposed to create jobs with that extra money. Bullshit. Suffice it to say, Republicans believe profit is more important than people. Solution? Give the money to the lower and middle class who will spend it by buying things they need and want. When there's demand, supply can grow. The more business you have, the more it grows. The more it grows, the more jobs get created. The more jobs get created, the more spending happens. The more spending happens, the more the economy gets a boost. However, Republicans don't like giving middle and lower class Americans any money because to them, that's a "handout" when they need to be pulling their own weight in this economy by getting a job. Well, they'd get a job if there were jobs available! But sorry, all the jobs are going overseas so fortune 500 companies can make even MORE money...after the government already gave them big tax breaks.

This year, in Texas, Republicans are trying to pass a Voter ID bill that makes it very difficult to be registered to vote. The idea is that it enhances voter security to prevent fraud. This bill primarily targets the poor, minorities, marginalized societies, and young people. Typically, these demographics tend to vote Democratic. So, who isn't majorly affected by this bill? The elderly and gun owners - aka - the people who typically vote Republican. So, in a nutshell, Republicans want to pass a bill that gives Democratic voters major hurdles to jump through, and keeps it easy for Republican voters to cast their ballot. I don't know about you, but that sounds corrupt to me. But, Republicans can't be corrupt. They're Christians!

Now, in Texas, one of the biggest issues is teachers' jobs. Our state is facing a massive multi-billion dollar deficit, and the state is choosing to balance the budget by laying off teachers, because, you know, teachers are really expensive with all the money they make. It's not like they matter. They only work 10 months out of the year. So what if Johnny can't read very well? He'll get there. We believe in him. It's not like he needs to know how to read or how to do math to find a stable job in our economy. Really?! How did this shortfall even happen? Well, back in 2006, Republicans passed a law that changed how school districts spent money. They made districts cut about 10% of their spending. So, where did that money go? To corporations. But it was okay - the government was going to pay the difference to balance the budget. Well, that worked...for about 3 years. Economists were even warning that we'd experience a multi-billion dollar deficit in 2011, and the Republicans ignored the warnings and took money from schools and gave it to CEOs. Now who's paying the price for the deficit? Teachers and the students they serve. Our future. And this is the moral political party? I don't think Jesus would have done anything like this.

I've only touched the iceberg of Republican policies. But based on this alone, I have no respect for the party, and little respect for those who support them. All this can change, though. Do your homework and vote. After all, we're not the kind of country that lets corporations run our lives. Oh, wait. We are now, courtesy of your local and state Republicans.

When you're a teacher...

When you're a teacher...
...you're also a peacekeeper teaching a large group of kids who could be strangers to each other how to get along on a daily basis for 10 months.

When you're a teacher...
...you're also a counselor learning why your student may suddenly be upset when they are usually upbeat.

When you're a teacher...
...you're also a parent loving and caring and providing for a child who may be completely neglected at home...assuming they live with their parents.

When you're a teacher...
...you're also a multitasker who can and must teach the exact same thing many different ways depending on each child's unique needs.

When you're a teacher...
...you're also a time manager making copies, making phone calls, meeting parents, preparing lessons, attending required professional development sessions...sometimes all in an hour if you're lucky enough to get an hour.

When you're a teacher...
...you're also a small business owner fundraising to take a group of kids on a trip somewhere to enhance their learning.

When you're a teacher...
...you're also a student attending all kinds of trainings in an effort to give your students the best educational experience possible.

When you're a teacher...
...you're also your own financial adviser looking for the best, most practical and most economic ways to spend whatever budget you have on materials needed to teach what you're expected to teach (if you even get a budget).

When you're a teacher...
...you're also a social worker advocating for a student's success, especially when they have apathetic parents.

When you're a teacher...
...you're also a confidante to kids who can't tell their parents something out of fear of what they might do.

When you're a teacher...
...you're also a motivational speaker giving kids a reason to not give up and believe in themselves, especially when their own parents have little or no belief in their ability.

When you're a teacher...
...you're also a presenter ready to show new minds why any new topic is the most fascinating thing they'll ever learn about.

When you're a teacher...
...you're also a computer genius using all forms of state-of-the-art technology to enhance a lesson's effectiveness.

When you're a teacher...
...you're also a lobbyist proving why your position shouldn't be eliminated due to budget cuts.

When you're a teacher...
...you're also a team builder teaching different kids how their individual strengths can be used for a common good.

When you're a teacher...
...you're also a moderator possibly hearing 1 story told 6 different ways, and each way insisting to be the truth when kids struggle with interpersonal conflict resolution.

When you're a teacher...
...you're also a lifeguard creating, fostering, and maintaining an environment where kids feel safe, enabling them to learn.

When you're a teacher...
...you're also an editor looking at a student's best work and show them how to make it even better.

When you're a teacher...
...you're also a skilled negotiator getting non-compliant or defiant students to do what you need them to do, especially when their own parents struggle with them.

When you're a teacher...
...you're also an innovator doing the best work you can using whatever resources you have available to you.

When you're a teacher...
...you're also a mentor role modeling for kids how to make good decisions and follow through with them.

When you're a teacher...
...you're also a psychoanalyst learning what you need to do and how to do it in order to reach a student and pull out their greatest potential.

Because, when you're a teacher...
...you're also a trained professional who gets paid to work with other adults' kids, people coming from an extreme diversity of backgrounds, and get them all to accomplish many goal in their own unique way on a daily basis for the better part of a year.

"Teaching is the essential profession, that which makes all other professions possible." -David Haselkorn

I didn't get this from anywhere. These are my thoughts based on my experiences after just 4 years of teaching elementary music to kids in Pre-K to 5th grade.

Facing the music

My previous post was a very passionate one. I was seriously thinking of quitting music to sell Mary Kay products for a living. I felt like God had answered a prayer and told me which direction I needed to take my life in.

That was less than a month ago.

This month, from February 9-12, I attended the annual Texas Music Educators Association (TMEA) convention in San Antonio. My Kodály professors were there giving several clinics, and I attended nearly all of them. One fo the clinics ended up being my absolute favorite, called "Keep the Music Going with Easy Musical Transitions". The title says it all. Part of the Kodály approach in elementary music education is to teach music musically. If you're teaching music, then already your activities will be musical. But when you change from one activity to another, you can make your transitions a musical experience as well.

Attending that one particular clinic was like a much-more-needed answered prayer. I'm so glad I went to TMEA. It was incredible and so worth it! The clinicians of this particular clinic demonstrated different ways they execute transitions within a 45-50-minute lesson. They performed in front of 3rd-5th graders who had excellent in-tune singing, were very attentive, it was just awesome. What was really impacting, though, is that after they explained the transitions they were to apply in the clinic, they actually went through an entire Kodály lesson plan. This was my first time witnessing a full lesson being performed. Best part? I could tell what was what in the lesson. See, when you execute a lesson using the Kodály approach, every activity morphs into a different one, and with musical transitions, it gives the lesson a special flow. This flow is critical to this approach to teaching. Unlike the typical classroom teacher doing a lot of talking, giving instructions, etc., the Kodály teacher teaches an entire lesson using music, singing, non-verbal communication, anything to keep the music going. What ensues is a musical dialogue between student and teacher.

All that being said, having seen what I needed to see, my passion for MK has returned to the back burner, and I am now 100% remotivated to complete my Kodály certification, which my career depends on. All that's left is 2 teaching videos, at a minimum of 30 minutes each. I have to do a lower grade (1st or 2nd), and an upper grade (3rd, 4th, or 5th). I've written out and tweaked my lessons, and a friend/colleague has looked them over for feedback. I've recorded 3 classes so far. Said friend/colleague has viewed the videos I've made to this point, and I've received lots of praise and some constructive feedback. These teaching videos are given a grade of "pass" or "fail".

It is so motivating to know that I know what to do, how to do it, and I can submit 2 videos that show a very improved approach to my teaching.

Both figuratively and literally, I'm facing the music. I am developing my skills. One thing I really like about this is that I can show my parents what Kodály training has taught me and my students to do. For a while I've bitched and bitched, and bitched, complained and whined about how much I hated this program because of how much trouble it's given me. In retrospect, I've loaded some highly unnecessary personal drama on some very wonderful people. There are several people who've been amazing supports to my completion to this (which is now imminent):

God, Frank, Mom, Dad, Sarah, Monika, Sandra, Martha Jean, Skye, Nathan, Heather, Lisa, Tiffany, Andrew, Gaby, Lynnel, Katherine, Lauren, Lori, Alyssa, Rebecca, and of course the profs and director of the program themselves. I ask for forgiveness from those who've heard me be a big-ass whiney baby for the past nearly 8 months. I'm doing it. I'm almost finished, and I THANK YOU ALL for helping me get to where I am.

According to Zoltán Kodály himself, "Music belongs to everyone." This approach to teaching helps foster this philosophy, and I'm learning how to execute it.